Wednesday, January 14, 2015

A DAY IN THE LIFE (By Mrs. I Define Me)

Morning prayers - I'm grateful for
The blessings of my life
My children, grandchildren, & hubby
And the Gospel of Jesus Christ

"Please help me Lord - I'm muddling through
I need guidance & light from above
Please bless my family, neighbors, and friends
Help me feel and reflect thy love"

At least a little scripture reading each day
I've been doing this for years
I'm amazed at the difference it makes for me
I feel the spirit and often shed tears

If hubby is home I climb back in bed
"Do you want to go with me for my walk?"
Sometimes he will go... but mostly
He just wants to "cuddle" and talk

When he's working he's up at 4:30 am
Working long days and far from home
I miss him and he misses me
But we're used to this 'being alone'

If hubby is gone, which he quite often is
I'm up at the break of dawn
I wish I could sleep in but I'm just like my Dad
So I put my walking shoes on

Well, sometimes I don't - I just step out in my robe
I sit on my front porch and breathe
I love the fresh air, it's a great start to the day
Deep breathing is important to me

And so A Day in The Life begins
Good intentions - but I confess
There's always a list - but when hubby is home
We play it by ear and ignore the mess

There's the family, yard, bills, and all that
The same stuff I guess everyone's got
But we're not really strict and when hubby is home
We go to Costco and dine out a lot. 

Because my Mr. is a popular guy
Everyone wants to spend time with him
He's got fix it jobs for family and friends
Such a good guy, he spreads himself pretty thin

There's always some business and work on the side
But he somehow finds time to fish
Or hunt (in season of course), or camp in the hills
A professional sportsman would be his 1st wish

Oh, he likes me too - I know this for sure
We hang out, laugh, and have lots of fun
I tell him, "If I could choose again....
For me, he would still be The One"

Sometimes we have fights - well disagreements I'd say
But we mostly communicate well
We pray together alot and have common goals
That's how we made it through those years from hell

I think we appreciate what we have now
Mr. IDM's a strong and wonderful guy
We're surely not perfect, but I think we're great
We love our interesting life

As I already said - we like to dine out
But when we cook together it's fun
I do the veggies and fruits and healthy stuff
He does the meat and gravy for one

He's not into "clean eating", he thinks I am wierd
But someday he'll see the light
And give up his Coke, Mt. Dew, & treats
Then he won't suffer from heartburn at night

So here's a little bit of truth, I hope he'll forgive me
For telling on him just a bit
My side of the garage is organized and in totes
But if I clean up his side he'll throw a fit

Some days when he's away I get a whole lot done
It's my time and I usually work
But sometimes I really don't do much at all
Except prayer, scriptures, dishes, and facebook

My day often consists of running here and there
It seems I'm often just putting out fires
But I'm glad to take time to shop a little at Kohl's
Gotta use that Kohl's cash before it expires

I do some yoga, sometimes swim at the pool
I have big plans to get into this blog
I have projects piled up and I'm writing a book
But mostly I'm stuck in a fog

I read stuff online - mostly health and self help
I read blogs that I truly adore
It's seems I'm quite busy - I volunteer each week
and I plan to volunteer alot more

We have one still at home, and some married kids too
We have grandchildren that are such a joy
We had only granddaughters until last year
We were finally blessed with a boy

We get together for shows, for dinners, and such
Vacations, camping, boating and family fun
But mostly everyone is doing their thing
Work, school, and church keeps us all on the run

We are all faced with trials, we are probably like most
we think we have more than our fair share
We have been through alot, but we're surviving it all
2014 was difficult year

We are grateful to God for the tender mercies we've seen
Without prayer it would have been grim
We believe in the Atonement of our Savior Jesus Christ
We have truly been blessed by Him

Each Day In The Life of Mr. IDM and his wife
God is called upon through humble prayer
We testify that He is real
So grateful that He's always there


  1. When Mr IDM is away do you ever worried he may stray?

    1. (Very cool that you made your question rhyme - lol)

      Actually, I really don't worry about my husband when he is away. It's funny because I am actually a worrier about other things but for some reason not that. Maybe it's because I just have this trust in him that is born from the original distrust that I had to work through after he did stray years ago. I can't exactly put my finger on it to explain because I know it probably just sounds naive or like I'm in denial or something, but I feel it in my heart and soul to the point that I believe it is the complete opposite of naive or denial. For me, it comes from real experience, continuous communication with my husband, and constant prayer with my Father in Heaven. Not to sound arrogant or overly confident, but it really comes down to FAITH - faith in my husband and our marriage, and especially faith in God to direct our paths, and to guide and comfort us both.

      I'll tell you a little secret - something that my granny taught me clear back in my teens (I loved my Granny so much and spent LOTS of time with her - we could talk about anything). One day we got on the subject of being jealeous and she told me that worrying about such things is a complete waste of time and can actually damage a perfectly wonderful relationship. If your loved one is going to be unfaithful (physically or emotionally) you can't do anything to stop it. Just love in the best way you know how, back off and have faith.

      After being cheated on, and feeling like I was made a fool of...... I experienced a paradigm shift and began to see the truth, that I was not the fool, he was. As 'we' healed, and as I healed (and it was not easy) I started to have compassion for him and his circumstances. As I let go of my anger toward him I developed mercy for him and through my Savior and Amazing Grace I was healed and renewed.

      After watching Mr. IDM become humbled and turn his life over to God and the Gospel of Jesus Christ, I gained a whole new respect for him and vision for us. We have grown together through a horribly difficult and heart breaking situation and have come through it with a new and amazing relationship better than ever before. I have the knowledge of the past but not so much the memories. I all seems so far away and long ago. I guess anyone would think, after his years of infidelity, that I'd be 'gun-shy', but instead I feel the opposite. It's like I'm highly sensitive (in a positive way), I'm confident in our relationship and I know where we stand, I feel my husband's love and commitment to me and to God - and the worry is removed. The fear is replaced with faith. I guess that is the peace that comes from striving to do what your heart believes is right, and in trying to live the gospel of Jesus Christ.

    2. Now, in all honesty, we are surely not perfect, either of us. There are occassionally times when a line is crossed and we talk about these things immediately. For instance, most of the time I am completely unaffected by Mr. IDM noticing other men - as a matter of fact, it goes both ways. We talk about certain features we see in men and women, people in general, like I'm sure everyone does. It seems that 98% of the time the intention is clearly good and there's no negative vibes. But once in a while, if either of us feels a little uncomfortable about the other's actions (such as looking too long, - entertaining daydreaming that feels disrespectful of the other, - or saying something that stirs up hurt feelings) then we immediately talk about it and set it straight. I think it is easy for couples to avoid talking because their communication skills are lacking and so they're afraid to confront each other with issues for fear of confrontations, so they stay hurt and little things build into big things. Successful communication requires humility and a genuine desire to work through things before they can get out of hand. There is no room for defensiveness if you know you both ultimately want the same thing. Now, if at any point either of us wants something else more than "us' then it would be over..... because the bottom line is we both know that you can't have your cake and eat it too - it just does not work. If either of us feels the other is 'drifting away' then we speak up, find resolutions, and get back on track. Our relationship used to be a roller coaster ride - (I hate roller coasters), but now it's more like the ferris wheel, we still have ups and downs, but it's basically a peaceful and enjoyable ride, occassionally pausing with some breathtaking views from the top.

      I once read a book called, "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" - it suggests that when worrying about something, we should think about the very most absolute worst thing that could happen..... then determine what we would do 'if' that happened. Ultimately you show yourself that no matter what--- there is always a way to handle anything and everything. So, with us - we have literally lived through some of the very worst that could happen and we survived. We each know where our limits are, we know and appreciate our common goals, and we know from where our strength comes... from God.

      I am also mastering the art of NOT WORRYING about my children, the finances, and all the things I don't get done each day. My goal is to live each day and each moment, to let go of yesterday, and not fear tomorrow. It is not easy, but it is so rewarding, and brings great peace to my life when I am able to Let Go and Let God.

    3. What do you think about the show, "My Husband's Not Gay' and the rating scale of hotness and the sleepovers and the camping trips.

    4. Sorry it has taken me a few days to answer this question. We have not had a chance to watch it - can't find it online, but we have watched the TCL trailer for it and I (Mrs. IDM) have read a few articles about it.

      For us it comes down to this....... (in regards to the response that seems to be mostly against people like us who have chosen to live in mixed sexual attraction marriages. PS - that's not an official name for our choice or anything, it's just the wording I chose at the end of this sentence. I'm not into politically correctness -lol )

      So - It feels like we are living in the eye of the storm. The whirlwind violently swirls all around us but we are completely fine, happy, and feel safe and confident right where we are. We are completely aware of many, from 'out there' in the whirlwind, who attempt to reach into our chosen and well established place of peace and happiness to try to grab us, touch us, hurt us, shake us, or even pull us into the whirlwind..... but we only feel sorry for their life in the whirlwind. It is enevitable that our being here establishes an example to others who might desire to choose a path similar to ours - but we are ABSOLUTELY and IN NO WAY encouraging or promoting our choices for anyone else. We are not reaching out to the whirlwind to attempt to touch or grab anyone... but we surely don't need to hide, and should not be expected to hide who we are, what we choose, or how we live.

      Certainly people will judge and have opinions and many will not understand. That is true for everything and everyone on this earth. It's interesting to me that a few stories brought to light of some unique individuals causes sooo much concern, since TLC has long since been in the business of telling unique stories about interesting people, lifestyles, and individual choices; often the more shocking the better, ...... with no petition to shut it down until now (that I know of anyway-I actually don't watch much tv).

      Seriously folks - we're just doing our thing - we are pretty mild, humble, peaceful individuals. We are not marching in parades, demanding that others agree with our choices or choose our paths. We do not claim to have answers for anyone except ourselves, but we are willing to share our experiences and beliefs with those who are interested. We fully recognize that we are all just muddling through and we understand that our lifestyle and choices seem unusual and even wierd to most. Many just cannot comprehend, or wrap their brain around how we live and what we choose - but that's OK. We would love more understanding and respect but can live without it.

      Some may think, (and genuinely believe) that 'we' are in denial of who we really are...... but to us, it is clear that 'they' are the ones in denial of who 'we' really are.

      No one wants to be denied the opportunity to be who they know they really are.

      "Sometimes God calms the storm ---- And sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms His child"